Now that this blog has become a little bit more popular, I have received a couple of e-mails asking why I am so focused on my boys having so much sensory play, and not as much "school" work. I don't feel like I have to explain myself, but maybe a little bit of background on our situation may be helpful to somebody else. You never know. So, here is our story of why we are so obsessed with sensory play in our house.
It started back in the spring of 2011 when we realized that something was not totally clicking with Pierce. He would not let me leave his side, was extremely attached (to an unhealthy extent), did not like people coming in the house that he did not know, and absolutely detested being dirty. I am talking a full blown melt down if he had dirt on his hands. He loved baths, but hated any water going over his head. Being in my 3rd trimester of pregnancy with Carter, I didn't really think anything of it; I just figured he was a stubborn child who knew what he wanted. There were also a lot of changes going on in our lives. My father was just diagnosed with stage 4 liver cancer and given months to live. On my own will, I packed up a bunch of my stuff and Pierce's stuff and started spending 4-5 days a week with my parents, and 2-3 days a week with Dan. It was not the best situation, but I knew my time was valuable with my dad.
It was actually my dad that sat me down shortly after Carter was born and told me, "I love you, but there is just something not right. He is not really speaking, he is more than attached, and the kid has a temper I have never seen in a toddler." I remember those words so clearly as we sat at the edge of my dad's bed talking. And it dawned on me, he was right. Shortly after the passing of my dad (yet another life change for Pierce), I had to bring Pierce to the doctor for his 18 month well visit. He started asking me questions about Pierce that were raising red flags to the doctor, but the final culmination was when the doctor went to lay Pierce back for the examination and Pierce actually kicked the scope out of his hand. By the end of that visit, we had a referral in our hands for something called Birth to Three.
I was hesitant at first to even call them. It is hard for any parent to hear that there may be something wrong with their child. We all want the best for our kids, and all have visions of these perfect boys and girls going off to school and becoming successful adults. Soon after I called them, there were a total of 3 people coming to the house to "assess" Pierce. First we had a teacher and a speech pathologist that agreed he needed to have services. They were so convinced that he needed help in more ways they could offer, they actually referred him to an autism specialist. I still remember crying as I sat in the house by myself with these 2 complete strangers, holding my newborn and looking at my toddler. This was not part of my plan. Not at all.
The autism specialist came the following week, did her evaluation, and stated there were some concerns, but she did not believe it to be autism. She believed it to be a sensory issue. What?! What is that?! And starting January 2012, I became fully involved in learning all about so many more things that I never expected to learn about. We had a completely wonderful teacher that became a part of our life. Twice a week for an hour or more each time she would come to our house and make Pierce get dirty, in many different ways. She had him touch things that were rough (he could not stand tags in his clothes, or anything rough near him), had him finger paint (this was met with EXTREME opposition at first), and had him play in salt (I never would have thought of that). Twice a month we had a speech pathologist come in to help with him making shapes with his mouth and overcoming various food textural issues (he could not stand anything pureed or anything mushy). It was finally meeting with the occupational therapist that helped me completely understand everything as well. It was such a relief to finally understand my own child. I had never felt more relieved.
This whole process lasted for about 18 months. That was a solid 18 months of therapy to have him developmentally "catch up" to his peers. When they first tested his speech, he was at the cognition level (meaning he understood) of a four year old, but an expression level of a 9 month old (meaning he could only babble as well as a 9 month old at the age of 20 months). That massive gap was causing a lot of our issues, and closing that gap was my priority. Once we got the sensory issues under check, it was even more relieving. I learned so much through the services we received that I guess it sort of became my passion.
So, why do I still do all of this sensory stuff if the gap has been closed? Simple. It will forever be a process in our house. Even when we are crafting now, if he has glue on his hands, or paint, he will ask over and over to go wash his hands and come back. My answer is always, "No thank you. You may wash your hands when you are done. It is fun to be messy." It is a reminder to him that it is alright to be dirty, and eventually it will clean off. Just this summer we are finally to the point that when he falls he doesn't need a napkin right away to clean his hands. He uses his pants. All of this stuff that a lot of people take for granted is a work of progress here. So every time I get him to play in sand, play in shaving cream, salt, etc., it is a small victory and reinforcing that it's fun. Plus, I have noticed that both of my boys learn way more when their bodies are completely involved in something. That is just how a lot of toddlers and preschoolers learn.
Hopefully this may help somebody else that has been going through a similar situation. Hopefully it makes a little more sense why we have sensory play every day. But in any case, every child is different. What may work for my boys may not work for others. And we are slowly getting there with introducing writing pages and such. Pierce certainly has a love/hate relationship with them. But every day is a new journey and I have learned to embrace it. I have learned to love every challenge that we face together. And the most important lesson I learned a LONG time ago? Forget having a plan. Your children will never follow the same plan as you. :)
Have a great day everyone!
No comments:
Post a Comment